ScriptUO
General => Off Topic => Jokes! => Topic started by: Cerveza on December 29, 2011, 08:39:59 AM
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An atheist was walking through the woods.
'What majestic trees'!
'What powerful rivers'!
'What beautiful animals'!
He said to himself.
As he was walking alongside the river, he heard a rustling in the bushes behind him.
He turned to look. He saw a 7-foot grizzly bear charge towards him..
He ran as fast as he could up the path. He looked over his shoulder & saw that the bear was closing in on him.
He looked over his shoulder again, & the bear was even closer. He tripped & fell on the ground. He rolled over to pick himself up but saw t hat the bear was right on top of him, reaching for him with his left paw & raising his right paw to strike him.
At that instant the Atheist cried out, 'Oh my God!'
Time Stopped.
The bear froze.
The forest was silent.
As a bright light shone upon the man, a voice came out of the sky. 'You deny my existence for all these years, teach others I don't exist and even credit creation to cosmic accident.' 'Do you expect me to help you out of this predicament? Am I to count you as a believer'?
The atheist looked directly into the light, 'It would be hypocritical of me to suddenly ask you to treat me as a Christian now, but perhaps you could make the BEAR a Christian'?
The light went out. The sounds of the forest resumed. And the bear dropped his right paw, brought both paws together, bowed his head & spoke:
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"Lord bless this food, which I am about to receive from thy bounty through Christ our Lord, Amen
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hehehehehe - didn't see it coming!
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Amen. Always say grace before taking of thy food.
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Bears still use little white rabbits as toilet paper.
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Trail I was just thinking that lol
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Hey outlaw - good to see ya again!
How's your leg?
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Got the pins out finaly but im very weak its healing niceley finaly and im starting to learn to walk again its slow going and painful
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Hang in there and keep at the rehab!
I'm trying to lose some weight since I have a bad knee (had limes disease in 1985). Pain sucks!
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Hang in there and keep at the rehab!
I'm trying to lose some weight since I have a bad knee (had limes disease in 1985). Pain sucks!
Buddy has limes. He gets paid to donate his blood to studies.
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Dang but I hate needles!
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Hang in there and keep at the rehab!
I'm trying to lose some weight since I have a bad knee (had limes disease in 1985). Pain sucks!
With the walker i walked 88 feat and with out walker 28 feet during therapy haven t been abel to do it out of therapy yet thow