Author Topic: Resumes I am Reviewing  (Read 7161 times)

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Offline PauloniusTopic starter

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Resumes I am Reviewing
« on: October 14, 2010, 05:50:48 AM »
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« Last Edit: October 14, 2010, 07:54:06 AM by Paulonius »
This coin declares Caesar is "Dictator for Life." He did serve as Dictator for the remainder of his life, but his life would end only a few weeks after this issue. For Caesar to put his image on coins and essentially declare himself king was too much for Brutus and his republican allies.

"If everything seems under control, you're not going fast enough'
-Mario Andretti

"If everyone is thinking alike, someone isn't thinking."
- General George Patton Jr

Offline Hoby

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Re: Resumes I am Reviewing
« Reply #1 on: October 14, 2010, 06:03:44 AM »
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yea, I spent quite a bit of time on my resume and am very proud of it. I was recently at a kinkos, or ups store using their printers to print up a few and this young kid, like 18 years old, was printing up his.  he left a couple copies on the printer, i curiously looked over one and was amazed how bad it was.  I almost went out after him to give him some help but he was gone.  At least spell check and read over it once, jeez.
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Offline PauloniusTopic starter

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Re: Resumes I am Reviewing
« Reply #2 on: October 14, 2010, 06:08:47 AM »
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For what its worth, I have read hundreds and hundred of resumes over the years and I edit lots of them. If anyone wants me to edit a resume, I am always happy to help.

... and I promise I won't start a thread making fun of it.
This coin declares Caesar is "Dictator for Life." He did serve as Dictator for the remainder of his life, but his life would end only a few weeks after this issue. For Caesar to put his image on coins and essentially declare himself king was too much for Brutus and his republican allies.

"If everything seems under control, you're not going fast enough'
-Mario Andretti

"If everyone is thinking alike, someone isn't thinking."
- General George Patton Jr

Offline Masscre

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Re: Resumes I am Reviewing
« Reply #3 on: October 14, 2010, 06:13:24 AM »
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Promises Promises :)

Offline 12TimesOver

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Re: Resumes I am Reviewing
« Reply #4 on: October 14, 2010, 06:13:46 AM »
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This just became my favorite thread of all time Paulo! Keep 'em coming!!!

So far the bartender is my favorite LOL!

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Re: Resumes I am Reviewing
« Reply #5 on: October 14, 2010, 08:51:54 AM »
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This just became my favorite thread of all time Paulo! Keep 'em coming!!!

So far the bartender is my favorite LOL!

X

can i be on the staff :)
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Offline PauloniusTopic starter

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Re: Resumes I am Reviewing
« Reply #6 on: October 14, 2010, 08:54:01 AM »
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You already are as an unpaid consultant with no official responsibilities but to look good, be charming and speak with an English accent. Bloody this and buggar that...
This coin declares Caesar is "Dictator for Life." He did serve as Dictator for the remainder of his life, but his life would end only a few weeks after this issue. For Caesar to put his image on coins and essentially declare himself king was too much for Brutus and his republican allies.

"If everything seems under control, you're not going fast enough'
-Mario Andretti

"If everyone is thinking alike, someone isn't thinking."
- General George Patton Jr

Offline Cerveza

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Re: Resumes I am Reviewing
« Reply #7 on: October 14, 2010, 08:57:54 AM »
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I can type 29 words a minute from home, and am familiar with the Office and the Interwebs stuff. I often prepare beverages!

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Offline PauloniusTopic starter

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Re: Resumes I am Reviewing
« Reply #8 on: October 14, 2010, 09:01:32 AM »
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Ha. You are hired too. Your unpaid position is to drink beer and type slowly from home.

Seriously though, the typing one cracked me up as much as any of the others.  I was looking through all of these resumes from women who can type like a house on fire, 75, 95, 125 words per minute and then I see one that says 29.  Just to make sure I wasn't crazy I jumped on "the Google", found a typing test and scored 60wpm, minus two for errors.  http://www.typingtest.com/
This coin declares Caesar is "Dictator for Life." He did serve as Dictator for the remainder of his life, but his life would end only a few weeks after this issue. For Caesar to put his image on coins and essentially declare himself king was too much for Brutus and his republican allies.

"If everything seems under control, you're not going fast enough'
-Mario Andretti

"If everyone is thinking alike, someone isn't thinking."
- General George Patton Jr

Offline Hoby

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Re: Resumes I am Reviewing
« Reply #9 on: October 14, 2010, 09:03:10 AM »
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wow, proficient with google
I like you, your death shall be quick and painless!!
I may have alzheimers, but at least I don't have alzheimers.
Walruses are like vampires, only awesome
Pwned-The total domination or shut down of a person or thing. 
I believe a hangover is gods way of saying you kicked ass last night!
Life's to short to remove usb safely.

Offline Masscre

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Re: Resumes I am Reviewing
« Reply #10 on: October 14, 2010, 09:03:36 AM »
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Quote

From Brandy B: I am trying to imagine the interview. I predict lots of smiles, maybe a little uncomfortable. Her resume is not great, but she seems so nice I feel more guilty than usual not bringing her in:

Quote
. I'm always enthusiastic, very easy to get along with, goal oriented, extremely professional, takes every task above & beyond with a smile on my face type of girl. I would love to be able to set up an interview with you so you can see so for yourself.


I would have to call this one in an interview her if nothing else but to meet here and test her :) LOL
« Last Edit: October 14, 2010, 09:05:21 AM by Masscre »

Offline PauloniusTopic starter

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Re: Resumes I am Reviewing
« Reply #11 on: October 14, 2010, 09:09:23 AM »
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There is something very porn about it that has me tempted -- and just a stream of conscious association to that thought, I noticed that there were 8 Brandy's in this sample of about 85 resumes.  Makes me wonder if there has been any study on whether if you name your daughter Brandy and she doesn't end up on a pole, is the other option admin?
This coin declares Caesar is "Dictator for Life." He did serve as Dictator for the remainder of his life, but his life would end only a few weeks after this issue. For Caesar to put his image on coins and essentially declare himself king was too much for Brutus and his republican allies.

"If everything seems under control, you're not going fast enough'
-Mario Andretti

"If everyone is thinking alike, someone isn't thinking."
- General George Patton Jr

Offline Hoby

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Re: Resumes I am Reviewing
« Reply #12 on: October 14, 2010, 09:09:40 AM »
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i scored 51 on the typing test.  
I like you, your death shall be quick and painless!!
I may have alzheimers, but at least I don't have alzheimers.
Walruses are like vampires, only awesome
Pwned-The total domination or shut down of a person or thing. 
I believe a hangover is gods way of saying you kicked ass last night!
Life's to short to remove usb safely.

Offline Masscre

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Re: Resumes I am Reviewing
« Reply #13 on: October 14, 2010, 09:11:13 AM »
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There is something very porn about it that has me tempted -- and just a stream of conscious association to that thought, I noticed that there were 8 Brandy's in this sample of about 85 resumes.  Makes me wonder if there has been any study on whether if you name your daughter Brandy and she doesn't end up on a pole, is the other option admin?

OK you convinced me I will help you work through a few resumes atleast that one. Just tell me when I need to be there.

Offline Masscre

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Re: Resumes I am Reviewing
« Reply #14 on: October 14, 2010, 09:14:11 AM »
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i scored 51 on the typing test.  

Well I scored 28 just one below the super woman.

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