Have you tried the usual suspects like run as admininstrator, and run in a compatibility mode for something other than Windows Ick?
Yea. Run as admin, run compatibility win7, vista etc... Nothing.
Wife's like why doesn't it work isn't this like a good laptop?... I'm like well the game is from 1997.
I "googled" all morning and only thing I found was someone with a similar issue and it was their sound card but mine's saying everything is "up to date".